The Taisho Brothers
by Carlson
Summary: The Taisho Brothers are unstoppable. One's an arrogant asshole and the other's a condescending emotionless bastard. They're a Hollywood superpower with the world in their hands. They hate each other's guts, but that's why they call it, "acting".


_I do not own Inuyasha. I'm pretty sure Inuyasha owns himself._

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><p><strong>The Taisho Brothers<strong>

**by Carlson**

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><p><span>Chapter One<span>

Fan-fucking-tastic

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><p>The Taisho Brothers were unstoppable.<p>

One was the understated sexy. He exuded confidence and arousal without ever making an expression his perfectly sculpted face. He pulled off the knee-length hair with ease and nobody questioned him. He was tall and had a fashion sense like a stereotypical gay man. But he was straight.

The other was cocky and wise-cracking. He had a sarcastic sense of humor and dashing good looks that kept the women coming. He could hold a rooms attention for hours just by smirking. He could wear a flowing black robe and still make it show of his body.

Yes, the Taisho Brothers were perfect.

Two men made of pure 100% unadulterated hotness. Oh, and they were talented, too.

You see, these aren't just your typical good looking actors hitting the red carpet. No, these men had never done a bad business deal in their life. The word "failure" was not in their vocabulary. Unless they were calling you one. They'd never made a movie that ranked less than four stars. They'd never sold out. No, they weren't just talented. They were smart, too.

And they didn't just act. Together they'd written and directed three box-office successes that went on to win Academy Awards. And they weren't even thirty yet.

They were untouchable.

Together, they could do anything.

One fan once said in an interview that if they told her to jump of a cliff, she'd do it. If they told her to punch herself in the face, she'd do it. If they told her to hop everywhere on one leg for the rest of her life, she'd do it. She'd do anything that they told her to. The video of that interview became one of the most viewed on the internet. 86% of the comments were ones about agreeing with her.

The Taisho Brothers held the world in their hands.

Their perfect hands that just happened to know how to play the guitar and piano. And that was great, because they could also sing. They once released an album. It went triple platinum.

There was nobody on the planet that could even dream of becoming greater than them. Because if you ever had that dream, they'd find you in your sleep. And nobody would ever find you again.

Yes, the Taisho Brothers were unstoppable.

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><p>"What do you mean he hasn't left yet?" hissed Sesshomaru through his cell phone. He was sitting in the back of a limo, all alone. "We're supposed to arrive together." It was obvious that he was furious, but he remained entirely composed. "If we don't, it'll cause riots. As much as I'd rather not see his face, we <em>have to arrive together.<em>" Something was murmured on the other line, but he didn't respond before angrily hanging up.

Sesshomaru had the limo circle around aimlessly before finally getting a call that he could arrive. Perfectly, the two brothers stepped out of their limos simultaneously. Inuyasha gave an award-winning smile while his brother changed nothing about his blank expression. They walked in sync towards the flurry of reporters and gave quick, rehearsed (yet naturally preformed) interviews.

When they entered the theater for the premiere of their movie, away from the cameras, they glared at each other deeply and went their separate ways. Sesshomaru disappeared into the theater to find their seats whilst Inuyasha made his way to the restroom. He had his hands in his pockets as he left the men's room, only to notice a rather delicious looking woman exiting the women's room. He jumped on this chance.

"Hello," he greeted, stepping in front of her, flashing his brilliantly white smile, "I'm Inuyasha Taisho."

She smiled slightly. "Kagome Higurashi. Pleased to meet you." She started to walk away.

"Where are you going?" he called, hurrying after her. "I've never seen you before."

"I'm here with a friend of mine, Sango Taijiya."

"Ah, I didn't know Sango had such beautiful friends," he said, standing in front of her again. "How did you meet?"

"A long time ago at school. She's probably waiting for me," pushed Kagome, continuing towards the hall again.

"I'll walk with you."

She smiled again, though not very genuinely.

"Are you excited for the movie?" he asked, but she ignored him and instead scurried off in the direction of someone he didn't know. Frowning, he entered the hall himself and was once again greeted with the warm welcome of fanfare for his glory. Inuyasha made his way through a mob of "Congratulations!", "Another great one from the Taishos!", and other such praise until he found the table with his rather inviting older brother sitting at it. (Sarcasm, folks).

"I thought you'd never arrive. I've received at lease six comments about your health in these past ten minutes," uttered Sesshomaru, slyly giving him a look of disapproval.

"Sorry a man's got to take a piss once in a while," snapped back Inuyasha, trying to keep their little argument discreet. A single slipup in their happy, carefree, loving brotherhood could derail everything they had, and neither of them thought it was worth it to destroy their careers over the simple fact that they absolutely hated each other's guts.

"I'll thank you to please act more dignified when we're in public," muttered Sesshomaru, leaning in close to his younger brother. They both peeked stealthily to their sides, taking note of the confused looks they were getting from their peers. They synchronously laughed convincingly to lighten the situation, Sesshomaru barely changing his stony veneer.

"Ah, for a minute there, I thought you two were in a fight," joked a voice from behind the brothers. He clapped a hand on either of their shoulders, cackling. "So, are you two excited for the movie?"

The brothers turned around to look at Miroku Houshi, a costar on their most popular movie (the sequel of which they were preparing to watch that very moment), _Epic_. It was that very movie that had forever restored the meaning of epic from the casual usage of "what an epic fail" to its original definition, to the glee of scholars everywhere. The sequel, _Legend, _had been awaited with baited breath for years. Miroku took a seat beside the brothers, grinning. "Well?"

"Of course," responded Sesshomaru. "It's always a pleasure to see our efforts on the screen, isn't it, Inuyasha?" He looked haughtily at his younger brother.

"Yeah," agreed Inuyasha, beaming, "it's the best." He smirked his signature smirk, which was a smirk that had won him both many awards and many ladies. "Especially because now everyone gets to bask in our glory again."

"Too bad there's only one installment left, eh?" offered Miroku, playing with a wine glass. "And it was just getting good..."

"More like too bad we have to go straight into filming immediately," whined the younger of the Taisho brothers, his face falling.

"Now, Inuyasha, no need for the sad face. It's an honor to be able to work with such prestigious people, especially our director," dissented Sesshomaru.

The trio all looked at each other dubiously.

"Well, we all know that's a lie."

And it was. Their director, Naraku Onigumo, was a quite horrible man who was disliked by almost all of those who worked under him. Unfortunately, he produced breathtaking movies and had irritating good looks as well. He was also incredibly smooth, which allowed him to coax actors into doing his movies despite his horrible reputation amongst the inner circle.

"Ah, if it isn't Sango," called Miroku, breaking the dark mood. Inuyasha's ears perked up at that.

Behind Sango she trailed the attractive woman Inuyasha had tried to woo earlier. "Well, if it isn't the notorious Miroku," muttered Sango. "Come on, Kagome, let's sit as far away as possible from him." She then made a point of sitting beside Inuyasha with her friend on her other side. She and Inuyasha shared an awkward glance.

"Hello, Sango," said Sesshomaru quietly.

"Sesshomaru," she acknowledged.

"Quiet everybody!" hushed Miroku stupidly, as no one around him was talking. People stared. A man across the room from them stood. Because he was exceptionally short, he was provided with a small podium. Microphone in hand, he began to speak.

"Welcome, all, to the premiere of _Epic_!" his eyes seemed to be bugging out more than usual. "It's been a long journey, and I have one thing to say: don't forget to feed your horse, it'll bite ya!" He laughed in a creepy sort of way.

Kagome turned to Sango, "That was his speech?" she whispered, looking slightly perturbed. Sango shrugged.

"That's Totosai for you."

Miroku chimed in, "Take his advice, though."

She frowned. "I don't have a horse."

Sango and Miroku chuckled, but didn't say anything. The lights dimmed and the movie started.

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><p>"That was <em>amazing<em>, Sango!" raved Kagome, beaming. "Definitely better than the first one, even though that one was amazing also! Totally worth not doing my stats homework!"

"So you liked it?" asked Inuyasha, coming up beside the girls. She looked up at him, but stopped talking.

"Yeah," she finally answered, her voice flat. Inuyasha's eyes narrowed, but he was persistent.

"What was your favorite p-" he tried to continue, but someone had grabbed the back of his collar, nearly choking him. He scowled, looking up to his assaulter. "What the hell was that for?" he seethed, quietly. Once released, Inuyasha composed himself.

"It's unbecoming to harass a clearly uninterested woman," uttered Sesshomaru condescendingly.

"Shut up."

Ignoring his younger brother, the actor continued, "We're leaving in my limo. We have some matters to discuss." He looked down at Inuyasha, which wasn't hard because he was a good few inches taller than him. "But now, we must address our adoring fans."

The pair waltzed gleefully into a sea of plaudits as they exited the theater, both of them taking time for photos and autographs. Inuyasha covertly glanced around for Sango and Kagome, but it seemed they had been devoured by the crowd. He even tried finding Miroku to see if he could get him out of whatever torture was in store for him in the limo ride home. Unsurprisingly, though, things didn't go his way, and no one came to save him from entering the vehicle with his brother, smiling on the outside, but cursing on the inside.

_Damn it. I hate my life. Why do I even have a brother? Why couldn't I have been an only child? Thanks, Dad, nice going. Really did me a solid on that one. Damn it. Damn damn fucking damn. _

"Inuyasha," said Sesshomaru.

"What?" growled Inuyasha, glaring. Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow. "Well, get on with it."

"Right. Well, then. I'll cut to the chase. I loathe you."

_Loathe. Of course he's too classy to just fucking say I HATE YOU MOTHERFUCKER. That's what I would do. Oh wait, I'm not classy. My bad. Next time I'll shove a stick up my ass and then we'll __talk. _

"But of course I didn't choose to spend more of my waking time with you to state the obvious. What I'm trying to say is that you need to get your act together."

"Is that it?" sputtered Inuyasha. _"You're a failure and you're going to ruin your career blah blah blah, I've heard it before, Sessh-let me show you how much greater I am than you-ru. You might as well stop here. Abort mission. Nothing's ever going to happen, Your Royal Jackassness. _

"No." The older brother drew in a deep breath. "I'm requiring you to find some help before I'm willing to continue with our career together."

The younger one blinked. "Excuse me?"

"I've giving you an ultimatum. Hire some help, go to therapy, get some brain surgery, I don't care, just get your act together, or I won't continue this little charade. I'm taking a gamble myself by doing this, but we're both going to go down if you don't get your mind out of the strip clubs and start putting our best interests at the forefront."

"I can't believe this," chuckled Inuyasha. "This is fan-fucking-tastic." _Well, today is just not my day. _"Well, Sessh, I'm going to hire an _assistant, _and I'll tell them to call you and tell you what I'm up to, okay?" _Go ahead and fuck me with spear. I'm actually doing what he tells me to. I'M DOING WHAT MY JACKASS BROTHER TELLS ME TO DO. That's right. Fuck. Me. With. A. Fucking. Spear._

"I'll hold you to that," said Sesshomaru as they pulled up to the younger brother's condo. "Have a nice day, little brother."

Inuyasha flipped him the bird before stepping out of the limo.

_Fan-fucking-tastic._


End file.
